The question
Do we tell children that they are not yet held accountable, that the obligations of Islam don't fall on them yet?
What about teens aged ten to puberty?
And does the answer change when the topic is specifically the prayer?
Some of them ask me: at what age does a person actually become accountable?
I'm afraid that if I tell them, they will become slack with worship as long as they are not yet held accountable.
Our answer
May Allah preserve you and bless you and your children, and make them a delight for your eyes in this life and the next.
Of course you can tell them they are not held accountable before the age of obligation and puberty, and that the good deeds and acts of worship they do, Allah rewards them for and records for them, while their faults are not held against them. This is part of Allah's grace and love for us, and how He, the Exalted, wishes to admit us into Paradise.
But they must get used to performing acts of obedience and leaving the forbidden, so that it becomes easy for them to obey Allah's commands once they are obligated.
The Prophet ﷺ said: "Command your children to pray when they are seven, and discipline them for it when they are ten…" Although a ten year old is not yet obligated, the Prophet ﷺ directed us to this so that they would be diligent in performing the obligation in its most complete form once obligation begins.
And Allah knows best.
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